Архив метки: Smile

Do You…?

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It is so easy to be happy!

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Think happy….Be happy!!!

Shoe Repair Shop

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Arnold and his wife were cleaning out the attic one day when he came across a ticket from the local shoe repair shop. The date stamped on the ticket showed that it was over eleven years old. They both laughed and tried to remember which of them might have forgotten to pick up a pair of shoes over a decade ago.

«Do you think the shoes will still be in the shop?» Arnold asked.

«Not very likely,» his wife said.

«It’s worth a try,» Arnold said, pocketing the ticket. He went downstairs, hopped into the car, and drove to the store.

With a straight face, he handed the ticket to the man behind the counter. With a face just as straight, the man said, «Just a minute. I’ll have to look for these.» He disappeared into a dark corner at the back of the shop.

Two minutes later, the man called out, «Here they are!»

«No kidding?» Arnold called back. «That’s terrific! Who would have thought they’d still be here after all this time.»

The man came back to the counter, empty-handed. «They’ll be ready on Thursday,» he said calmly.

Have а great day!

Let’s have fun :)

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Short story that made me smile! Hope you will enjoy it as well!

Eve and Adam
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God… «Lord, I have a problem!» «What’s the problem, Eve?» «Lord, I know you’ve created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedic snake, but I’m just not happy.» «Why is that, Eve?» came the reply from above. «Lord, I am lonely. And I’m sick to death of apples.» «Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you.» «What’s a ‘man,’ Lord?» «This man will be a flawed creature, with many bad traits. He’ll lie, cheat, and be vainglorious; all in all, he’ll give you a hard time. But, he’ll be bigger, faster, and will like to hunt and kill things. He will look silly aroused, but since you’ve being complaining, I’ll create him in such a way that he will satisfy your… ah, physical needs. He’ll be witless and will revel in childish things like fighting and kicking a ball about. He won’t be too smart, so he’ll also need your advise to think properly.» «Sounds great,» says Eve, with an ironically raised eyebrow. «What’s the catch, Lord?» «Yeah, well…. you can have him on one condition.» «What’s that, Lord?» «As I said, he’ll be proud, arrogant, and self-admiring…So you’ll have to let him believe that I made him first…So, just remember… it’s our secret… Woman-to-woman!»

Hmm, i guess i should say Sorry to all guys who will read it. Please don’t take it close to your heart! 🙂

Kind regards,

Have great day, and Smile cuz

Life is wonderful!

 

Never Make A Woman Angry !!! :)

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It so happened that once a woman arrived at the Gates of Heaven……
While she was waiting for Saint Peter to greet her, she peeked through the gates. She saw a beautiful banquet table. Sitting all around were her parents and all the other people she had loved and who had died before her.
They saw her and began calling greetings to her, «Hello ! How are you ? We’ve been waiting for you! Good to see you.»
When Saint Peter came by, the woman said to him, «This is such a wonderful place! How do I get in?»
«You have to spell a word…» Saint Peter told her.
«Which word?» the woman asked.
«Love»
The woman correctly spelled «Love» and Saint Peter welcomed her into Heaven.
About a year later, Saint Peter came to the woman and asked her to watch the Gates of Heaven for him that day. While the woman was guarding the Gates of Heaven, her husband arrived.
«I’m surprised to see you» the woman said. «How have you been?»
«Oh, I’ve been doing pretty well since you died…» her husband told her. «I married the beautiful young nurse who
took care of you while you were ill. And then I won the multi-state lottery. I sold the little house you and I lived in and bought a huge mansion. And my wife and I traveled all around the world. We were on vacation in Cancun and I went water skiing today. I fell and hit my head, and here I am. What a bummer! How do I get in?»
«You have to spell a word» the woman told him.
«Which word?» her husband asked.
«Pneumonoultramicro scopicsilicovolc anoconiosis» , she replied !!!
Moral of the story:  Never make a woman angry . . . else ….there will be Hell to pay !

🙂

NB:
The longest word currently listed in the Oxford dictionary is the supposed
lung-disease pneumonoultramicros copicsilicovolca noconiosis (45 letters).

Postcards that will make you smile

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ВОЗРАСТ СУЩЕСТВУЕТ В СОЗНАНИИ. НЕ ДУМАЕШЬ О НЁМ — ЕГО НЕТ

 

МНОГО В ЖИЗНИ ВСЯКОГО, ЧТО МОЖЕТ ЗАХВАТИТЬ ТВОЁ ВНИМАНИЕ. НО ТОГО, ЧТО ПЛЕНИТ СЕРДЦЕ – МАЛО

 

В КАЖДОМ МУЖЧИНЕ ПРЯЧЕТСЯ РЕБЁНОК, КОТОРЫЙ ЖЕЛАЕТ ИГРАТЬ

 

НИКОГДА НЕ ДООЦЕНИВАЙТЕ СПОСОБНОСТЬ РЕБЁНКА ВЛИПАТЬ В БОЛЕЕ ТЯЖКИЕ БЕДЫ

 

ПОЛЮБИТЬ — ЭТО ПРОСТО. НО СОХРАНИТЬ ЛЮБОВЬ — НЕЧТО СОВСЕМ ОСОБЕННОЕ

 

СТАРОСТЬ ОБЯЗАТЕЛЬНО ПРИДЁТ, НО СТАРЕТЬ НЕ ОБЯЗАТЕЛЬНО

 

ДРУГ — ЭТО ВТОРОЕ Я

 

ДРУГ — ЭТО ТОТ, КТО БЕРЁТ ТЕБЯ ЗА РУКУ, НО ДОТРАГИВАЕТСЯ ДО ТВОЕГО СЕРДЦА

 

КТО СОЗДАЁТ ТВОЙ МИР — ЭТО ТВОИ ДРУЗЬЯ

 

ГДЕ БЫ ТЫ НИ БЫЛ, ДРУЗЬЯ — ЭТО ТЕ ИЗ КОГО СОСТОИТ ТВОЙ МИР

 

ЗАВОДИ НОВЫХ ДРУЗЕЙ, НО СОХРАНЯЙ ПРЕЖНИХ. ПЕРВЫЕ — СЛОВНО СЕРЕБРО, ВТОРЫЕ — КАК ЗОЛОТО

 

КТО НАХОДИТ ДРУГА — ОБРЕТАЕТ СОКРОВИЩЕ

 

ГЛАВНОЕ ДЕЛО МАЛЕНЬКОГО ЧЕЛОВЕКА — УПРАВЛЯТЬ ВСЕЛЕННОЙ

 

УВЕРЕННО ШАГАЙ ДОРОГОЙ СВОИХ ГРЁЗ

 

ЛУЧШИХ ДРУЗЕЙ НЕЛЕГКО НАЙТИ. С НИМИ СЛОЖНО РАССТАТЬСЯ. А ЗАБЫТЬ — ВООБЩЕ НЕВОЗМОЖНО

 

СТАРЕТЬ — НЕИЗБЕЖНО. А ВЫРАСТАТЬ — НЕ ОБЯЗАТЕЛЬНО

 

ОБЪЯТИЯ — КРАТЧАЙШЕЕ РАССТОЯНИЕ МЕЖДУ ДРУЗЬЯМИ

 

ОБНЯТЬ — ИДЕАЛЬНЫЙ ПОДАРОК, МОЖНО ДАРИТЬ ЕГО НЕЗАВИСИМО ОТ РАЗМЕРОВ ДРУГА

 

БЕЗУМИЕ — ВЕЩЬ НАСЛЕДСТВЕННАЯ. МОЖЕТ ПЕРЕЙТИ К ВАМ ОТ ДЕТЕЙ

 

ВЕСЕЛЬЕ — ЛУЧШЕЕ ЛЕКАРСТВО

 

ЖИЗНЬ ПОЛНА СЮРПРИЗОВ

 

НЕ ГОДЫ ВАШЕЙ ЖИЗНИ, А ЖИЗНЬ В ВАШИ ГОДЫ

 

ЕСЛИ ЛЮБОВЬ НЕ ВРАЩАЕТ ЗЕМНОЙ ШАР, ТО ПО-КРАЙНЕЙ МЕРЕ ПРИДАЁТ СМЫСЛ ЕГО ВРАЩЕНИЮ

 

МНОГО ЛЮДЕЙ ПРОХОДИТ ЧЕРЕЗ ТВОЮ ЖИЗНЬ, НО ЛИШЬ ДРУЗЬЯ ОСТАВЛЯЮТ СЛЕДЫ В ТВОЁМ СЕРДЦЕ

 

НЕ ИДИ ВПЕРЕДИ МЕНЯ — Я МОГУ НЕ ПОСПЕТЬ. НЕ ИДИ ПОЗАДИ МЕНЯ — Я МОГУ ЗАВЕСТИ НЕ ТУДА. ПРОСТО ИДИ РЯДОМ СО МНОЙ И БУДЬ МОИМ ДРУГОМ.

 

ЕСТЬ ТОЛЬКО ОДНА ВЕЩЬ, КОТОРУЮ ДЕТИ ИЗНАШИВАЮТ БЫСТРЕЕ, ЧЕМ БОТИНКИ – РОДИТЕЛЕЙ

 

У ДРУЗЕЙ ЕСТЬ СПОСОБНОСТЬ — ОБЩАТЬСЯ БЕЗ СЛОВ

 

РАДОСТЬ ТОЛЬКО ТОГДА НАСТОЯЩАЯ, КОГДА ЕЁ МОЖНО РАЗДЕЛИТЬ С КЕМ-ТО

 

САМЫМ БЕСПОЛЕЗНЫМ ДНЁМ БЫЛ ТОТ, В КОТОРОМ МЫ НЕ ПОВЕСЕЛИЛИСЬ